With a nod to the Catholic Movie Guy, I have finally found a way to square the circle of lamenting the senseless transfer of Ascension Thursday to Sunday, and yet showing my obedience as a Catholic to the authority of the shepherds who did it.
We must appeal to that same authority to make an even more senseless transfer of Easter Sunday to the following Thursday.
I mean, one of those feasts ought to fall on Thursday, right? And since moving feasts around doesn’t matter, it might as well be Easter Sunday. Those with rigid liturgical sensibilities could always have a commemoration of Thursday in the Octave of Easter, which in the novus ordo would be, of course, optional.
Think of the side benefits: those bishops who don’t really believe in the Resurrection could ensure fewer Catholics would be exposed to the concept. Those other bishops desiring to appeal to the cynical millennials could exploit the power of the irony of the situation. And hey, it keeps to the pontifical agenda of planned, newsworthy chaos.
So, fellow Catholics, who’s with me?
Sure. Humor. For your enjoyment, Meddling Catholics presents the Antipope Probability Calculator.
How humorous is it that when I used this calculator the result I got was 99%?
Methodism can trace its roots to Anglicanism, which left the Church over divorce and remarriage. Marriage survives as an institution to this day, though it is reeling.
Now they’ve gone too far. Methodists are trying to take over the Fish Fry.
No word from the Vatican yet.
Well and truly off topic and hopelessly local, but I couldn’t help but note the passing of the last remnants of the former local-legend Mexican restaurant line Casa Gallardo. Ol’ Ramon Gallardo cashed in the franchise long ago, but several restaurants continued to operate the brand.
As a yoot on the mean streets of Jefferson County (yes, it explains a lot), heading north into the oh-so-high-class South St. Louis County for a meal at Casa Gallardo was like hitting Tony’s.
I once broke up with a girl who ordered a hamburger instead of Tex-Mex. True story.
¡Adios, Casa Gallardo!
If this photo from the Post-Dispatch doesn’t get you thinking about Judgement Day, then you need to up your Lenten sacrifice.
Thankfully, these aren’t Catholic priests (not even the lady).
This post is in honor of my eldest daughter, who was asked during a scholarship interview if she thought it important to know from where her food comes.
The above clip is from The Simpsons, and Troy McClure sets Jimmy straight. For more, check out this post on all-time Simpsons greats at Grantland.
I read this story in the UK Daily Mail, and would have let it pass as another mildly entertaining story on nostalgic ads from the past, except for the one above, which hits a little close to home.
At this point, I hope that you have your Lenten plan ready to roll. If not, why not consider this whimsical plan devised by John Zmirak some years ago. This is taken from the archives of the now defunct “Godspy” site, but perhaps Dr. Zmirak will forgive the liberty if I provide this link to Crisis Magazine, for which he now writes.
Did your Lenten penances get lost in the desert? On April 1st, here are one bad Catholic’s ideas for making Holy Week suitably grim.
By John Zmirak
10. Schadenfreude: That warm, grim feeling of satisfaction you get from watching planes crash, stocks plummet and presidential candidates debate. Best to dampen this enthusiasm in preparation for a Holy Easter.
9. Foxhunting: Bloodsports are generally discouraged in the 40 days before Our Lord shed His.
8. Discussing the “spiritual problems” of a friend with everyone you know, “so they’ll remember to pray for him.”
7. Writing single-spaced letters of complaint to: a) The local bishop, b) The Vatican, or c) The Catholic League for Civil and Religious Rights.
6. Forwarding emails of the following types:
5. Hand-rolled cigars or French cigarettes (smoking the cheap ones is a penance).